I don't want this to be a sappy saga, nor do I want or need to explain extravagant details of a love story that is my own. Not to look a certain way to others, not even for myself really. My greatest desire is for my love story to be a sweet representation of the God I serve, the ultimate lover, friend, groom and everything in between. my maker.
I have been so incredibly blessed these last few months, seeing so many friends and family come along side me in full support. How humbling when you have everyone in your entire life that has been there, for one day with prayers, finances, time and everything else come and watch such a monumental moment in my life. I am constantly reminded, even weeks after. What a gift it is to have family and friends in your life that love and support you. Especially those from all around the country, all around the world. And even more so, I am humbled and completely taken back by the man I gave myself away to that day. John. I want nothing more than for every single person I love, to get to experience the ultimate joy and fullness it is to know Christ, and to know real, unconditional, never-ending love. I must have been asked the question a million times. " Are you sure? " How do you know"..."Is it true ? "They say you just know".... Do you know?
I cannot explain it more than to say YES. You really just do know. 2 weeks after I met Johno, I knew he would be the man that I would marry. Clearly shocking since for all my life before, I never really did want to get married. I never knew real love, I never believe it could really exist. I thought that everyone else was good enough for a love story that lasted, but not I. I had been down that road before, and I wanted to leave it as less traveled as possible. In my life there was just too much tragedy, too many times where I was wrong, and not enough men that could prove otherwise. I had given up.
Our God never gives up on us, what a simple statement yet with vast meaning I do not feel we take serious enough in this life. Because there was so much competition in the midst of my past mistakes and heartbreaks, a wall was too high for anyone to really climb. I had given the Love thing a try or two, but change took its chances and death stole my dreams, and I was left with nothing..............and EVERYTHING.
A Savior who was in constant pursuit of his bride.
I am his bride, before I was ever Johnos bride, I will always be the bride to my Lord and Savior before anything else. I could never truly except the real love, nor trust it from another person until I fully became able to accept the full love of Christ. I truly believe it was not until I could accept the full love of Christ, that God let Johno come into my life to teach me and show me the physical representation of the way it should between a bride and a groom.
In the way Christ loved the church, husbands love there wives.
(Ephesians 5:22-23, quoted)
Because I am married , I have not yet arrived. I have not yet done everything I have wanted to do in life, nor have I found all that I was looking for as most would imagine. It is only in the sincere deep revelation of Christs love and relationship with me, that I fully will "succeed" in life. But I am always learning. I am always loving. I am sometimes leaving, and God is always coming after me.What a gift to marry the man of God I truly believe from before the beginning of time, was ultimately created for me. What a gift it is to serve a God who is ravished by me, so much that he would create, mend, mold, and send me a man that loves me in the way God intends him too. A man that is by no means perfect, but surely forgiven. And a man that is on this journey with me.
| And I will betroth you to me forever. I will betroth you to me in righteousness and in justice, in steadfast love and in mercy.I will betroth you to me in faithfulness. And you shall know the LORD. Hosea 2:19-20 |
